Sngesinye isikhathi, ebusuku edolobheni engihlala kulo, eToronto, ngizobe ngihamba ngedwa ngiya noma ngisuka esiteshini esingaphansi komhlaba. Akekho omunye ozobe esemgwaqeni, futhi ngizobona owesifazane ehamba eduze kwami โโโโekude. Isimiso sami siwukuba ngiwelele ngaphesheya komgwaqo lapho ngibonakala khona kahle, futhi ngimvumele adlule ngebanga elide phakathi kwethu. Uma ngihamba ngemva kowesifazane ebusuku, ngizokwenza okufanayo โ ngiwele umgwaqo, ngidlule ngokushesha ukuze angibone phambi kwakhe kunokuba angizwe ngemuva kwakhe.
Ngingase ngazi ukuthi ngiyindoda engenangozi, kodwa yena akanalo. Ngokumnika isikhala, yena, njengowesifazane ohamba yedwa, unento eyodwa encane yokukhathazeka ngayo.
Emigwaqweni, emabhasini, emigwaqweni engaphansi komhlaba, emakhempasi, ezimakethe, kunezinhlobonhlobo zokuziphatha okuncane amadoda angakwenza ukuze avule, noma avale, indawo yomphakathi kwabesifazane. Ngihamba emgwaqeni eDelhi, ngibone amaqembu ezinsizwa ezi-5-6 zihamba ndawonye, โโzilindele ukuthi wonke umuntu uzophuma endleleni yawo. Noma iqembu lamadoda libuthene lizungeza isithuthuthu. Isinyathelo esilandelayo, engisibonile naso, ukubuka, noma ukugqolozela, ngokuqondile, kowesifazane noma iqembu elincane labesifazane endaweni. Ukufundisa okunjalo kungase kungabi nacala, kungase kube ukubukeka okuthakazelisayo noma okukhangayo, kodwa umphumela wako wokuxhumana wehlukile. Iyaxhumana: Lesi isikhala sami, lesi sikhala sowesilisa, futhi uma ufuna ukuba kuso, kuzomele wamukele ukubuka kwami.
Ngobudoda, isimo sowesilisa, ukubheka amehlo okweluliwe ngokuvamile kungase kube ukwesaba, isimemo sokulwa. U-Rory Miller, obesebenza emajele ase-US futhi obhala ngodlame, ubeka lolu hlobo lwempi yabesilisa ngokuthi "I-Monkey Dance" - isiko eliklanywe ukuziphendukela kwemvelo ukuze kutholakale ukuthi ngubani inkawu enkulu kunazo zonke. Kuqala ngokubuka okunwetshiwe, kuyakhula njengoba enye indoda ibuza: โUbukani?โ Indoda yokuqala iyaphendula: โCha, ubhekani?โ Uma kungekho qembu elihlehlayo, ingxoxo igcina ikhuphukela kumagalelo angokomzimba.
Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi kuqondiswe kwenye iduna noma kowesifazane, lolo hlobo lokubuka okugxilile luwuhlobo oluthile lokwesabisa. Kodwa iketango lokukhuphuka lihlukile uma liqondiswe kowesifazane. Uma owesifazane ebuza ukuthi โubukani?โ, owesilisa angabe esephawula futhi asondele, ngokuvamile aphendule ngokuthi: โlutho baby, kulungile, ungathukutheliโ. Ukubuka okungafunwa kukhuphukela ekuthintaneni ngamazwi okungafunwa, ekuthintaneni ngokomzimba okungafunwa. Isinyathelo ngasinye ekukhuphukeni sincane, kodwa esinyathelweni ngasinye kuqukethwe umuzwa welungelo kanye nokwehliswa kwesithunzi somuntu wesifazane okwenza ubugebengu obukhudlwana njengokudlwengula nokubulala kwenzeke.
I-logic eyisisekelo yileyo ethi izikhala zomphakathi zabesilisa, lapho abesifazane bengamukelekile. Unya olwenziwa kubantu besifazane luyingxenye yokuphikisana nokungena ngendlela engenakugwemeka kwabesifazane kulezi zikhala kanye nokugomela kwabo amalungelo abo. Ezindaweni zokusebenza, lezi zithatha uhlobo lokuhlukumeza ngokocansi; ekhaya, ngobudlova basekhaya, naphambi kwabantu, ukuminyana kwendawo, ukubuka nokuphawula kobulili, nokwanda kobudlova.
Izishoshovu zabesifazane nababhikishi eDelhi babize ngokufanelekile ukuthi ukuziphatha kwabesilisa yinkinga. Isiqubulo esithi โungayitsheli indodakazi yakho ukuthi ingaphumi, tshela indodana yakho ukuthi ingadlwenguliโ sibeka umthwalo wemfanelo lapho kufanele. Kodwa kukhona okunye okumele ukusho emadodeni. Kuningi esikwenzayo ukuvala isikhala kubantu besifazane, singase singazi ukuthi siyakwenza. Kodwa uma sikhona kulokhu kuqhubeka, siyingxenye yenkinga. Ingabe amadoda emigwaqweni, ezimakethe, emigwaqweni engaphansi komhlaba, emabhasini nasezikhungweni zezempilo azophatha abesifazane njengabalinganayo, noma azame ukusebenzisa ubudlova ukuze babaxoshe? Ngikholwa ukuthi abesifazane bazoqhubeka nokuzibophezela ngempumelelo futhi bangene kulezi zikhala, futhi noma nini lapho benza, izikhala ngokwazo ziba ngcono. Izinqumo ezenziwa amadoda zingenza inqubo ibe lula, noma ibe nodlame futhi ibe nzima.
Justin Podur unguSolwazi Ohlangene Wezifundo Zezemvelo eYunivesithi yase-York eToronto. Kule semester, unguSolwazi Ovakashile e-Jamia Millia Islamia eDelhi. I-imeyili: [i-imeyili ivikelwe]
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