Umbandela mkhulu kwaye unzima kwaye ulungelelwaniso luyimfuneko kwaye luyingozi. Njengogqirha wengqondo kunye nosapho lwengqondo, umntu ojongana neengxaki zemihla ngemihla kunye nezisombululo zabo, kule phaneli ndiza kugxila kumava am kunye neendlela zamva nje zobomi bosapho oluphakathi entshona, endithatha ukuba luhlobo losapho lwabaninzi abalapha. kubaphulaphuli.
Okokuqala ndimele ndikhankanye ukuba i-panorama yentsapho ephakathi kwentshona inzima kakhulu. Kumazwe aliqela, oothunywashe abantsonkothileyo abafakโ isandla ekubeni umlinganiselo woqhawulo-mtshato ube ubuncinane ngama-30 ekhulwini kumjikelo wobomi besibini. Kwabo batshate e-USA ukusukela ngo-1995 izinga liya kuthi ga kwi-50%. Kwabo baqhawula umtshato uninzi luphinda luphinde luphinde luphinde luphinde luphinde lutshate yaye izinga loqhawulo-mtshato lokuphinda litshate lingama-60%. Omnye umntu wathi ukutshata kwakhona luloyiso lwethemba phezu kwamava. Usapho lwemveli lwenyukliya, oko kukuthi, isibini nje kunye nabantwana baso bebhayoloji, abakhange babe ngaphezulu kwama-30% amakhaya kuvavanyo lwase-USA. Kwisifundo sePorto Alegre, kuphela isiqingatha solutsha oluhlala ekhaya kuphela nabazali bobabini. Ke namhlanje, ecaleni kosapho lwenyukliya sifumana iyantlukwano enkulu yeentlobo zeentsapho: iintsapho zabazali bomtshato wesibini, iintsapho zikamakhulu noomakhulu, iintsapho zezizukulwana ezithathu, iintsapho ezikhulayo, iintsapho ezinomama ongatshatanga, izibini ezithandana nesini esinye esikhulisa abantwana njalo njalo. Ngoko ke siphila kwihlabathi leyantlukwano, apho izakhiwo zemveli kunye nezitsha zihlala kunye. Ngokomzekelo, eBrazil ngenxa yoxinezeleko lwezoqoqosho nezidanga zasemva kwesidanga, abaselula bobabini babashiya kwasemva kwexesha abazali babo ekhaya, kodwa kwangaxeshanye abaninzi bahlala kunye namaqabane abo ngaphambi komtshato, nto leyo entsha ngokwenkcubeko. Ke kule mihla, siyakuphepha ukuthetha ''ngosapho oluqhelekileyo'' kwaye endaweni yoko, xa sijongana neengxaki zokuphila, sinikela ingqalelo kubunye kunye nemithombo yemeko nganye. Kananjalo asinakuthi umtshato usilelo okanye liziko elihlayo. Sinokuthi ngokuqinisekileyo iya isiba nzima ngakumbi njengoko kubonakala ngathi abantu abakayifumani enye indlela engcono yokukhulisa abantwana ngokusondelelana kunye nokhuseleko lweemvakalelo.
ISIBINI ESIHLE
Abantu banezinto zombini kunye neemfuno zokuhlalisana kwaye kubo bonke umjikelo wobomi bagcina ulungelelwaniso oluguqukayo phakathi kwezi seti zimbini zeempawu ezihambelanayo. Ukwahluka ngamanye amaxesha kuthetha inyathelo lokuqala kunye nokuzimela. Intlalontle idla ngokunxulunyaniswa nentsebenziswano, ialtruism kunye nomanyano. Ngeli xesha lomtshato sibeka phambili iimfuno zethu zasekuhlaleni-ngokunxulumene nezomntu ngamnye-sifuna ulungelelwaniso olutsha lweemvakalelo ngeprojekthi yesibini.
Ugqirha wengqondo waseMelika uLewis, exhaswa ngoogqirha abaninzi abaziqhelileyo, uchaze isibini esisebenza kakuhle:
ยท Incoko yababini i-franc kwaye ithe ngqo kunye nesithuba sezimvo ezahlukeneyo.
ยท Kukho indawo yomntu ngamnye kwaye kwangaxeshanye umanyano lwesibini lukhulu.
ยท Amandla asasazwa kakuhle ngeengxabano ezisingathwa ngothethathethwano hayi ngokunyanzelwa okanye izoyikiso.
ยท Abalingane banokuvakalisa ngokupheleleyo uluhlu lweemvakalelo zabo.
ยท Esi sibini sibonisa uqeqesho oluqhubekayo ebantwaneni, sikuphephe ukubandakanyeka ekungavisisani kwabantu abadala.
Kule nkcazo ingentla yesibini esitshatileyo kukho ukulingana, ukunyamezelana, intsebenziswano kunye nokulingana.
Umbuzo onika umdla ngulo: kunokwenzeka njani ukuba ngaphakathi kusapho lubonise ukulingana, ukunyamezelana kunye nentsebenziswano xa kwihlabathi elingaphandle kosapho eyona nto ibalulekileyo kubuntu, ukhuphiswano, ucalucalulo kunye nokuphila kwabona banamandla?
Siphuma njani kwihlathi lehlabathi lokwenyani ukuze singene โkwikhaya elimnandi laseKhayaโ? Impendulo ilula.
Akunakwenzeka!
Sonke sifika ekhaya singcolisekile ngokwasengqondweni kukudityaniswa kweengxaki zethu zomxholo-emsebenzini nakwihlabathi lentlalontle ngokubanzi. Kokubini ekhaya nakwihlabathi lentlalontle sisoloko silawula ukungquzulana phakathi kwenxalenye enye yethu ezama ukuhambelana nemilinganiselo yethu enzulu yobumbano kunye nokuthanda abanye kunye nenxalenye yethu efuna ukwenza ngokweyona nto yethu yexesha elifutshane. umdla . Oku kunokuba lungquzulwano oluqatha nolusisigxina.
Sidityaniswe neengqondo ukuba siphathe igazi lethu ngokwahlukileyo, nto leyo ethetha ukujongana noku kuphikisana ngokweemvakalelo njengoko sinakho ekhaya. Kukho umbono ovela kwilungelo lolondolozo elithi ngokwendalo singabantu ngabanye kwaye siyakhuphisana, ngoko ke sigwetyelwe ukudala ihlabathi, ekhaya nangaphandle, elibonisa le nyaniso yokwenyani. Lo mbono usuka ekunene usekwisiseko senkcubeko ye-'machismo', kunye nokuqina kwayo kweendima kunye nokwahlulwa okulinganayo kwamandla kusapho.
Umbono osekhohlo wahlukile. Siyazi ukuba abantu bayakwazi ukwenza okona kulungileyo nokona kubi kakhulu, sekunjalo sikholelwa ukuba abantu bangaziphucula, hayi kwi-'tabula rasa'', kodwa baqale kwiimeko zabo zokuhlala.
Sikholelwa ukuba abantu balingana kakhulu kunokwahlukana kwaye ayisiyiyo kuphela into esinokuyenza kodwa kufuneka sidale ihlabathi elahlukileyo elisekelwe kwintsebenziswano kunye nomanyano. Kukho ubungqina obuninzi kwizifundo ezininzi ze-ikholoji ukuba ukusilela ukwenza oko kunokuthetha ukuphela kwempucuko njengoko sisazi.
Ngoku ndiza kuchaza ezinye iimeko ezifanayo kwizigaba zomjikelo wobomi bosapho
UKUKHETHA AMAQHUBA
Xa sikhetha iqabane kukho into eyomeleleyo yokungazi, oko kukuthi, sikhetha umntu ophenjelelwa kakhulu ngamava ethu kusapho lwethu lwemvelaphi. Oku kunokuba ngumcimbi wonyango, kodwa sinolwazi oluninzi olubalulekileyo kubantu abatsha , abamelwe kakhulu kubaphulaphuli, ukubanceda babe nobudlelwane obuhambelanayo. Oku kusasazwa kolwazi kubalulekile kuba siyayazi indlela ecotha ngayo inkcazelo eyitshintshayo imikhwa eyendeleyo.
Ulutsha oluninzi lumitha olungafunwayo luze lutshate lucinezelwe sesi sibakala. Nangona oku kubonakala ngakumbi ngoku kwiindawo ezisezantsi kuneziphakathi, kuyaqhubeka kuyingxaki enkulu. Xa abantu betshata bekhulelwe bayatsiba ekubeni sisibini esitsha baye ngqo kubomi bosapho. Lo ngumsebenzi onzima kakhulu, ukutsiba isigaba esifuneka kakhulu apho bobabini bebodwa baqala ukuthethathethana ngemisebenzi emininzi yokuhlala kunye.
Abaninzi basatshata bebancinane kakhulu. Ukutshata umncinci kakhulu kuthetha ukuzama ngokwengqondo ukubaleka kusapho lwemvelaphi. Nangona oku kunokuzisa imvakalelo yokuzimela kunye nenkululeko, kukwathetha ukunganikeli ngqalelo ngokwaneleyo ukuba iqabane lingumntu okulungeleyo na. Kukho ibinzana elithi "Uthando aluboni kodwa xa sele utshatile uyawubuyisa umbono wakho!". Yinyani! Yiloo nto uninzi loqhawulo-mtshato lwenzeka kwiminyaka embalwa yokuqala yokuhlala kunye.
Enye imeko eyingxaki kuxa esi sibini sikunye iminyaka emininzi, masithi emine okanye emihlanu, kwaye ngokungabikho kwemiqobo yangaphandle, omnye wabalingane akaziva ekulungele ngokweemvakalelo ukuzibophelela. Iqabane elicatshukiswe ngokufanelekileyo yile meko linokwenza kakuhle ekufuneni unyango kuba emva kweminyaka emininzi kangaka ubani ufanele abe ekulungele ngokwenene ukwenza isigqibo sokuba iqabane likhethe kakuhle okanye akunjalo.
Enye imeko exhaphakileyo kubunyani bendawo yemarike namhlanje kukuba izibini ezininzi ziyatshata kwaye ziyaqhubeka zifumana uncedo lwemali kubazali. Oku kuyingxaki, kuba kwenza kube nzima ngakumbi umsebenzi wokuhlukana ngokwasengqondweni kwintsapho yemvelaphi. Kutshanje ndilandele isibini esiselula esaqhawula umtshato ngenxa yokuba umyeni wayengakwazi ukunyamezela ukuba isibonelelo esifunyanwa ngumfazi kuyise sasingaphezulu kunoko wayesifumana emsebenzini wakhe (nangona abanye abantu bephupha ngokufumana iqabane elinjaloโฆ).
Enye ingxaki exhaphakileyo kulutsha kukudityaniswa kwezithandani okubizwa ngokuba ''ngumtsalane wabachasi'. Oku kwenzeka xa umzekelo indoda ezolileyo itshata umfazi othetha kakhulu, umfazi onamandla ozimisele utshata nendoda engenzi nto, njl. Kufana nokuba abantu ababini abakhule ngokweemvakalelo bongeza iimpawu zabo kunye nokusilela ukwenza umntu omnye osebenzayo ngokwasengqondweni.
Oku kubashiya ngokucacileyo bexhomekeke omnye komnye. Ukuba omnye uzama ukutshintsha, ngokuqhelekileyo umthetho, omnye unokuchasa. Siyazi namhlanje ukuba isibini esihamba ngcono nguye odibanisa i-caracteristics ehambelanayo kunye ne-simmetrical. Oko kukuthi, ngaphaya kokuncedisana okanye ukungafani okunokuthi kutyebise isibini, amaqabane kufuneka athande ukuthanda okufanayo, izinto ezinomdla kunye neeprojekthi , izithako zento esinokuyibiza ngokuba ngumhlobo. Kuwo wonke umjikelo wobomi uninzi lwezibini ezitshatileyo ezitshatileyo zithi lo mba wobuhlobo uzuza ngokubaluleka ngaphezu kwesini kunye nothando lothando.
Xa bebuzwa, izibini ezininzi zibenza lula iingxaki zabo besithi eyona ngxaki inkulu abanako ukunxibelelana. Oku kuvumelana nohlolisiso lwakutshanje olubonisa ukuba izibini ezininzi zineengxaki ''ezingenakunyibilika'' .UGottman uye wabonisa ukuba ezo ngxaki zihamba nabo kubo bonke ubomi babo. Umzekelo umyeni uya kukhalaza ukuba umfazi uchitha kakhulu, uya kuthi uthe cwaka kakhulu, njl.njlโฆ Umahluko phakathi kwezibini eziqhawula umtshato nabangazukulala kubuchule bokugqibela bokudala iindawo ezininzi ezintle ngaphandle kongquzulwano. . Ke abanyangi bayazi ngoku ukuba akunamveliso ukuhlala kakhulu kwiingxaki ezidlulileyo kodwa kunokuba banceda isibini senze ubambiswano olungakumbi kunye nolonwabo.
INQANABA LOKUQALA LOMTSHATO
Emva komtshato kukho ukulindela ukuba ekuhambeni kwexesha amaqabane aya kuba ngowona mntu ubalulekileyo ngokwasengqondweni, apho ngaphambi komtshato lo mntu ufumaneka kwintsapho yemvelaphi. Eminye imisebenzi esisiseko kwesi sigaba kukusekwa kwenkqubo yesiqhelo yasekhaya kunye nokuthethathethana ngemibuzo efana nokwabelana nabahlobo, utyelelo losapho, imali, indawo kunye nomsebenzi wasekhaya.
Namhlanje akukho mathandabuzo ukuba abafazi bafumana ukulingana okukhulu namadoda. Kodwa bahlala bethwele umthwalo omkhulu wokunyamekela abantwana, abadala kunye nomsebenzi wasekhaya. Ngoko namhlanje abafazi abazimeleyo banamhlanje xa bekhetha iqabane abafuni kwakhona umboneleli olungileyo obukekayo kodwa bakhangele endaweni yeqabane eliya kuba ngumzali othatha inxaxheba kunye nokusebenza kwimisebenzi yasekhaya.
ISIBINI ESINABANTWANA ABANCINANE
Utshintsho ukusuka kwisibini ukuya kusapho yinto ebaluleke kakhulu. Omabini amalungu avelisa iinkcukacha ezintsha njengotata nomama. Kwezi ndima zintsha zibalulekileyo kulapho bathi baphuhlise iingxaki ezifanayo malunga nendlela yokukhulisa abantwana babo. UWithaker wayedla ngokuthi umtshato luhlobo apho iintsapho ezimbini zithumela abameli ukuba bazivelise kwakhona. Nangona iindima namhlanje zibhetyebhetye ngakumbi, amaqabane ahlala etyholana ngokubayekelela okanye anegunya. Eyona ngxaki ixhaphakileyo ebantwaneni isanxulunyaniswa nokubandakanyeka kubazali babo ukungakwazi ukuhambelana noqeqesho. Xa besiba neengxaki zokuziphatha, ngokufuthi omnye wabazali, ngokuphandle okanye ngokufihlakeleyo, uyabaxhasa.
Enye ingxaki ekhoyo kukubandakanyeka kakhulu kwabazali kubantwana, nto leyo eyonakalisa ubudlelwane bothando. Njengenxalenye yesi sigaba kuqhelekile ukubonakala kwemicimbi yangaphandle komtshato.
Kuluntu lwethu lwabathengi abazali kweli nqanaba bacinezelekile ukuba basebenze nzima kakhulu ukukhuthaza imisebenzi yabo, banakekele kakuhle abantwana kwaye okokugqibela kodwa kungancinci, abanakulibala ukwenza umthambo kunye nokonwaba okuninzi! Eyona nto ibalulekileyo kukunandipha ubomi! Xa ukuthathela ingqalelo konke oku unokumqonda u-Erich Fromm xa wayedla ngokuthi umbuzo kwixesha lethu ayisosizathu sokuba abanye abantu baphambane kodwa yindlela abanye abakwazi ngayo ukuhlala bebhadlile.
Abazali babantwana abancinci banokukulawula oku kuphela ukuba banexesha elininzi lokukhululeka kodwa kuluntu lwethu lwangoku ekuphela kweqela elinexesha elininzi lokukhululeka ngabantu abangaphangeliyo. Kwaye abavuyi kakhulu loo nto. Uphando phakathi kweengcali zempilo yengqondo ababecinga ukuba ''ziimodeli'' zengqondo ezibanjwe zibonise ukuba iqela elikhethwe njengemizekelo liquka abantu abasebenza kodwa bengabantu beentsapho, abanomdla kunye nemisebenzi yokuzonwabisa. Ngoko kubonakala kucacile ukuba sifuna uluntu olutsha oluya kubonelela ngexesha elaneleyo lokukhululeka kumntu wonke. Kwenzeka ukuba le yinjongo yemveli kwi-socialism.
ISIBINI SABANTWANA ABAFIKISAYO
Ulutsha olufikisayo olusempilweni luyazixambulisana nabazali balo malunga nenkangeleko, isibonelelo, ixesha lokubuya ekhaya nokunye okunjalo. Xa umntwana ofikisayo eneengxaki ezimandundu, njengokungaphumeleli esikolweni, ukukhotyokiswa ziziyobisi okanye ukwenza izinto ezichasene noluntu, le pateni idla ngokuqala ngaphambi kokufikisa. Ngexesha lokufikisa, abazali bahamba nengxaki yobomi baphakathi kwaye ootatomkhulu babonisa ukuwohloka kwempilo. Ingxaki yobomi obuphakathi ithetha ukuba abantu abadala abaqolileyo abanabantwana abadala bayabuphonononga ubomi babo. Banexesha elininzi lokukhululeka, banokuvuselela ubudlelwane bothando, kwaye baqondise ubomi babo kwiinjongo ezinqwenelekayo, umzekelo ukuhamba ngakumbi, ukufunda okanye ukuzonwabisa. Xa ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi oku kungenzeki, kuyinto eqhelekileyo ukufumana abazali abadakumbileyo abaziphazamisayo ekukhathazekeni kwabo ngokubandakanyeka kakhulu kumntwana onengxaki. Oku kusondela ngokugqithisileyo kwabazali yinxalenye yesangqa esikhohlakeleyo apho umntwana ofikisayo eqhubeka ebonisa ukuba ufuna ukuzimela ngakumbi kubazali kodwa eneneni ukhubazekile ngokwasengqondweni kwaye akakwazi ukuqhubeka nemisebenzi yokufikisa.
Elinye iqela elibangelโ umdla lolutsha olufikisayo, olusahlala ekhaya eBrazil, lakha kunye nabazali balo iminqweno emitsha yesini. Bazisa amakhwenkwe abo kunye namaqabane abo ukuba bachithe ubuncinci ukuphela kweveki kwigumbi labo kwikhaya labazali babo. Abazali babeyinxalenye yenguqu yezesondo yamashumi amathandathu. Baxhasa abantwana babo ekuphepheni iimotele ezinokuba yingozi okanye zibiza imali eninzi. Kodwa omabini la maqela eneneni aya kukhetha iindawo zokuhlala ezahlukeneyo ukuba kunokwenzeka ngokwezoqoqosho, apho ubumfihlo bazo zombini buya kukhuselwa ngakumbi. Kuluntu lwexesha elizayo siya kufuna i-arquitecture yezindlu eyahlukileyo. Into yangoku ibonakala iyilelwe ngokukodwa iintsapho ezinabantwana abancinci.
Enye ingongoma ebalulekileyo kwesi sigaba yimfuneko yokuba abazali banyamekele ootatomkhulu nootatomkhulu abagulayo. Ngokufanelekileyo oku kunika ithuba lokugqibela lokuba basondele kunye, phambi kokusweleka kwesizukulwana esidala. . Abaninzi bayayisebenzisa kwaye inomvuzo kakhulu. Kwabanye ukusilela kwiinzame kushiya abantu abadala bengenalo uncedo olufunekayo.
UKUTUKA KWABANTWANA KUNYE NE''EMPTY NEST SYNDROME''.
Ngesi sigaba isibini kufuneka silungise ukuze sihlale sodwa kunye. Xa abantu bephila ixesha elide, esi sigaba sinokusuka kwiminyaka yama-60 ukuya kweye-80, sibe sesona side kumjikelo wobomi. Ingxaki yomhlalaphantsi ilapha. Sifuna ukuguquguquka ngakumbi kunye nomhlalaphantsi. Abanye abantu baqhuba kakuhle kakhulu, abanye badandatheka kakhulu. Umfazi wesizukulwana esikhulileyo owayeliqabane nomama usenokuba nobunzima bokuba ngumhlolokazi. EUnited States i-10 pesenti yoomakhulu ngabona banyamekela abazukulwana. Xa izinto zingahambi kakuhle, iimpawu zengqondo ziyindlela eqhelekileyo yokuba abantu abadala bazame ukufumana ingqalelo. Omnye umthwalo obalulekileyo wabantu abadala kuxa kufuneka baqhubeke bexhasa abantwana babo abasele bekhulile.
UDIVORCE
Uqhawulo-mtshato luye lwalindelwa phantse njengesiganeko ''esiqhelekileyo'' kumjikelo wobomi. Namhlanje sithetha ngoqhawulo-mtshato olulungileyo nolubi. Isinye kwisithathu silungile, esinye kwisithathu sibi, esinye kwisithathu sinongquzulwano oluphakathi. Uqhawulo-mtshato oluhle lulo apho abantu abadala bekhusela abantwana kwingqumbo yabo omnye komnye. Bobabini baqhubeka bebona abantwana kakhulu. Namhlanje sicinga ukuba umzali onelungelo lokugcina umntwana kufuneka ibe nguye oya kubonelela ngofikelelo olukhulu komnye umzali. EUnited States ishumi leepesenti looyise ngabazali abanelungelo lokugcina umntwana. Kwelinye icala, ishumi ekhulwini lootata ekugqibeleni liyanyamalala kubomi babantwana babo. Ingakumbi abo bangahlawuliyo imali yesondlo. Xa ukwahlukana kulungile iingxaki zabantwana azidli ngaphezu kweengxaki ezincinci zezemfundo. Kwelinye icala ukuba abazali baqhubeka bethetha kakubi omnye komnye. iimeko ezinzulu ngakumbi zinokufunyanwa.
UKUTSHATA kwakhona
Uninzi lwamadoda aphinda atshate phambi kweminyaka emibini kodwa ukuphinda kutshate akuzinzanga nangaphezu kokutshata kwakhona kokuqala. Uninzi, amashumi amathandathu ekhulwini, luphela kuqhawulo-mtshato nabantu abakhulu besithi bebengalindelanga iingxaki ezingaka nabantwana bomtshato wesibini kunye namaqabane angaphambili. Ngoko ingongoma ebalulekileyo kukuba abantu bangaphinde batshate ngokukhawuleza. Okokuqala kufuneka badibanise ubudlelwane besibini kwaye bajongane nobunzima obuninzi kumsebenzi wokudibanisa iinkcubeko ezimbini eziqhelekileyo ezahlukeneyo zemfundo. Esinye isizathu esilula sokuba abantu bangxamele ukuhlala kunye kukuba kubiza kakhulu ukondla amakhaya amabini. Kwakhona kuluntu olwahlukileyo sinokwenza ngokwahlukileyo. Ukutshata kwakhona kufuna incoko eninzi kwaye ukukhangela unyango ayingombono umbi. Kungathatha ukusuka kwi-4 ukuya kwi-7 iminyaka ukuba usapho oluphinde lutshate lufumane inqaku lokulingana - kwixesha elidlulileyo sasicinga ukuba iminyaka emi-2 inokwanela- kodwa akukho sizathu sokulindela ukuba iintsapho ezitshatileyo ziphile ubomi obanelisayo ngokupheleleyo. Bamele babone imingeni yabo njengenxalenye yobunzima obuqhelekileyo bokuphila.
Iziqhelaniso ezimbini ezikhawulezayo zabazali bomtshato wesibini:
Ungadimazeki xa ufumana ifomu yokuqala yokwala abantwana bomtshato wesibini. Oku kulindelekile, okubangelwa kukungavisisani nokunyaniseka nomzali ongenalungelo lokugcina umntwana.
Shiya imiba ephambili yoqeqesho kuqala kumzali wendalo.
INGABA ENYE INTSAPHO IYAKHO?
LUYIFUNA LUPHI INTSAPHO?
Isihloko sethu ngokubanzi ngumngeni wolunye usapho. Ndiyathemba ukuba sithe sakroba kukho namhlanje sele kukho usapho olutsha, ecaleni kwesiqhelo. Siphila kunye nentsha kunye nendala. Kodwa siyazi ukuba olu sapho lutsha luya kuqhakaza kuphela ukuba uluntu olujikelezileyo luyatshintsha ngaxeshanye. Ziziphi iimpawu zolu sapho lutsha?
Mandazise esi sihloko ngamagama amathathu abaluleke kakhulu kubantu basekhohlo.
UKULINGANA, INKULULEKO NOBUDWE.
Ngokuphathelele ukulingana siye sabona ukuba kwizizukulwana ezitsha, isibini esilungileyo sijongene bhetele kakhulu ngokulingana ngokwesini.
Ngokumalunga nenkululeko kunye nenkululeko asinakulibala ukuba inkululeko yokutshata ngenxa yothando kwaye uhlale utshatile nje ngenxa yothando lufezekiso lwenkulungwane yama-20, kwaye kwamanye amazwe kuphela.
Ngokuphathelele ubuzalwana ndifuna ukuthi le ngcamango inxulunyaniswa nombingelelo kunye nokulahla, amagama angaziwayo kakhulu namhlanje, kungekhona ekunene, kungekhona ekhohlo. Akwanelanga ukuthi i-capitalist neoliberal society ikhuthaza ukuzingca nokhuphiswano kuwo onke amanqanaba, kwaye oku kuchaphazela umtshato nobomi ngokubanzi.
Akwanelanga. Njengogqirha wengqondo ngokuqinisekileyo ndifumanisa ukuba abantu kufuneka bahlakulele ukukhungatheka kokunyamezela ukuba siza kwakha intshukumo entsha yentlalontle. Ukwakha le ''ntshukumo yeentshukumo'' intsha kufuneka siphuhlise ukuvumelana kunye nemvisiswano'ayizi ngaphandle kokulahlwa kunye nomoya odibeneyo wokuzincama. Ngelishwa sisabona ii-companheros ezininzi ezibonisa ukhuphiswano olubi, ukuzingca kunye nobufundamentali bezopolitiko, konke oku kukhokelela ekuphatheni oogxa babo njengeentshaba kunamaqabane.
Kunokunceda ukukhumbula ukuba iimfundiso zazo zonke izithethe ezinkulu zokomoya zinokushwankathelwa kwisivakalisi esinye:
Phatha omnye ngendlela ongathanda ukuphathwa ngayo!
Ngasekhohlo kufuneka sijonge omnye komnye ngovelwano ngakumbi, sikhangele into esidibanisayo, singajongi into esahlulayo. Le ilensi yasekhohlo! I-lens apho umqathango wempilo entle yenye ikwintlalontle yenye. Ngokucothayo sakha isazela sokuphucula ubomi bethu kuwo onke amanqanaba, ekuhambeni kwexesha kuya kufuneka siphucule ubomi babo bonke abasingqongileyo. Yiyo loo nto silwela ukudityaniswa kwehlabathi okutsha, okwakhiwa ukusuka ezantsi ukuya phezulu, okusekwe kumanyano kunye nedemokhrasi. Sele sisakha uluntu olutsha ngesimo sengqondo esitsha, kodwa esi simo sengqondo sitsha kufuneka sisasazeke ngakumbi. Kwaye kufuneka sincede. Kwaye kufuneka iqale ngoku, nomntu ngamnye wethu.
Olu tshintsho lwesimo sengqondo lufanelekile ukubalisa ibali.
Utata okumgangatho ophantsi waya kwintlanganiso yokuphela konyaka kwisikolo sikarhulumente awayefunda kuso unyana wakhe. Inqununu yesikolo ivuyisene nabo bonke abazali abebekho, isithi abantwana abangaqhubi kakuhle esikolweni abanabazali abathatha inxaxheba, nto leyo ekucacayo ukuba ibingenjalo kwabo bebekho. Wahlabela mgama echaza indlela ekubaluleke ngayo ukunikela ingqalelo enkulu ebantwaneni. Xa intlanganiso yavulwa ngemibuzo neempendulo lo tata wacela ukuthetha wathi:
''Utshilo ukuba abantwana abaphumeleleyo ngabo bafumana ingqalelo enkulu kubazali babo. Ewe , kwenzeka ukuba ndingumhlolokazi kwaye ndinonyana omnye oneminyaka eyi-13 ubudala. Ndisebenza ebusuku so xa ndifika endlini ulele xa ndivuka wabe sele emkile ukuya esikolweni. Rhoqo ebusuku xa ndifika endlini ndiye egumbini lakhe, ndimncamise kwaye ndibophe iqhina kwengubo esekupheleni kwebhedi yakhe. Xa evuka ekuseni alibone iqhina, limbonisa ukuba ndikhona nendlela endimkhathalele ngayo. Kodwa ngoku undishiye ndinexhala ucinga ukuba kufuneka ndimnike ingqalelo engakumbi kwaye andazi ukuba njani!โ
Inqununu yabuza igama lonyana, yaye xa uyise wathi inqununu yaqonda ukuba ngomnye wabafundi abagqwesileyo esikolweni.
Yicinge loo nto!
I-ZNetwork ixhaswa ngemali kuphela ngesisa sabafundi bayo.
Nikela