Yakhala nthawi ya mathero ndi zoyambira kwa ine. Kulimbana ndi matenda kwa miyezi yambiri kunatha ndipo tsopano ndikuchira kuchokera ku opaleshoni yaposachedwapa. Chibwenzi chinatha ndipo tsopano ndikupitiriza kukana kuopa kuti sindingakonde chifukwa ndili ndi matenda aakulu. Ndasiyananso ndi gulu la ndale pamene ndikukula ndikukhala ndi chidaliro pa zomwe ndimakhulupirira komanso kufunafuna ndale zowona zomwe zimayamba ndi maubwenzi a m'dera langa. Pomaliza, monga munthu amene ndinaleredwa ngati wosakhulupirira kuti kuli Mulungu, ndayamba kuzindikira uzimu wanga m'njira zomwe zimandidziwitsa zomwe ndimasankha tsiku ndi tsiku komanso momwe ndimaonera ndale.
Ndapeza chakudya m'masamba a Starhawk's Kulota Mumdima: Zamatsenga, Kugonana ndi Ndale. Iye analemba kuti,
Tiyeneranso kufuna kuti ndale zathu zithandize kugonana kwathu. Nthawi zambiri, tapempha kugonana kuti titumikire ndale m'malo mwake. Chodabwitsa n'chakuti, mayendedwe omwewo omwe amatsutsa kuponderezedwa kwa kugonana ndi makhalidwe a bourgeois nawonso nthawi zambiri amayesa kuumba malingaliro awo ogonana kuti agwiritse ntchito chiphunzitso cha ndale. Mwambo umenewu umaphatikizapo kudziletsa kwachisinthiko kwa zaka za zana la 19, kufuna kwa New Left kuti akazi azikondana mwaulere (kutanthauza kugonana popanda kutengapo mbali), kuopa kugonana kwa amuna kapena akazi okhaokha m’kagulu ka akazi koyambirira, ndi mzere wololedwa wolekanitsa wotengedwa ndi ena m’kagulu ka akazi apambuyo pake. Mibadwo yambiri yafunsa kuti: Kodi ndale zanga zimandiuza kuti ndimve chiyani? Funso labwino ndilakuti: Kodi ine, muzu wanga, pachimake, ndimafuna chiyani?
Ndadzipeza ndili m'mabungwe andale omwe akumira m'nkhani zawo zamaphunziro. Ndiroleni ndinene momveka bwino: ngati mumadzitcha "intelligentsia yakumanzere," mulibe zochepa zomwe mungathandizire kugulu lodziwika bwino kusiyapo kusintha.
Kuyitana kwa Lerner kwa a ndale za tanthauzo zimagwirizana ndi ine. Tiyenera kubwereranso ku midadada yomangira anthu ammudzi: "anthu amalabadira zosowa zamkati, osati kudzipereka ku lingaliro losamveka, kapena lingaliro loti wina ayenera kuchitiridwa mosiyana ..."
Mu ndondomeko yanga yofufuza moyo, kutsindika kwa Starhawk pa zizindikiro ndi zithunzi kumanditsogolera ku ntchito ya Frida Kahlo.
Ndimayang'ana chithunzi ichi - A Fridas Awiri.
Ndapeza nkhani yokhudza ntchito yake yolemba Jeanette Winterson yotchedwa 'Live Through This':
Chigonjetsocho ndi choposa munthu payekha. Ndi chigonjetso choperekedwa kwa aliyense amene amayang'ana zithunzi zake. Ngati mungadziwone nokha ngati pakati, osati m'mphepete, ngati mungathe kudziwona kuti muli ndi malingaliro ambiri, mapuloteni otheka, omwe ali masomphenya a kudzikonda operekedwa ndi Kahlo, ndiye kuti pali mwayi pa ufulu. M'dziko lathu lapansi, anthu ambiri amamva kuti alibe mphamvu, moyo wawo umatsimikiziridwa ndi ena. Pano pali mkazi yemwe ayenera kukhala wopanda mphamvu, thupi lake linatsimikiziridwa ndi kuvulala, komabe amene adadzilenganso. Zojambula zake zimakhala ndi chikhalidwe komanso zauzimu zomwe zimapitilira kulimbana ndi nthawi. Iwo amayankha mafunso amene tonsefe tiyenera kudzifunsa: ‘Ndine yani? Ndine chiyani? Kodi ndingakhale bwanji mfulu?'
Kahlo atatuluka m'chipatala koyamba, adagona pabedi lazithunzi zinayi ndi galasi laling'ono likulendewerapo. Adayang'ana pagalasi ndipo adadziwona yekha. Ndicho chimene iye anajambula. Sanathe kuyang’ana panja, choncho anayang’ana mkati. Chikomyunizimu, Fascism, Imperialism, nkhondo, palibe chilichonse cha zinthu izi chinamudutsa, koma sakanakhala mnyamata wokwera pamakwerero akujambula dziko. Zochita ndi luso nthawi zina zimakhala zofanana, nthawi zina osati.
Nthawi zina ndimamva ngati ndili m'ndende m'thupi langa ndipo zimandipangitsa kuti ndisamanyengerere za ufulu wanga pazinthu zina za moyo wanga. Ndimaona anthu ambiri “athanzi” akukhala mwamantha. Akhoza kuthandizira malingaliro okhwima, koma sali okhwima.
Ngakhale malingaliro otsekera a Winterson ali pazaluso, amagwira ntchito kwambiri pazandale:
Ndimakonda ntchito ya Kahlo chifukwa imayika ufulu waumwini pomwe iyenera kukhala - pakati. Nthawi zonse amakhala wodzimvera chisoni, samadzikonda. Zowona kwa iyemwini, sanataye mwa iyemwini. Ngati mumakhulupirira, monga momwe ndimachitira, lusoli lili ndi dziko lonse lapansi - mkati mwake komanso kunja kwake - ndiye kuti mikangano yokhudza mbiri yakale, kapena zolemba, kapena zenizeni, posachedwa imakhala zabodza. Chofunika si mbiri ya moyo wake, koma zoona zake. Osati zolemba koma umboni. Osati zenizeni, koma zenizeni. Chofunikira ndichakuti ntchitoyi imatifikitsa pafupi ndi ife komanso kumvetsetsa za moyo muzovuta zake zonse. Kahlo ndi wojambula kwambiri chifukwa ndi zomwe amachita.
Choncho, ndimayembekezera moleza mtima kuti thupi langa likhale lolimba. Ndimadikirira kuti ndipite ndi anthu kukasonkhana, kuseka, kulira, kukwera, thukuta ndi kumenyana. Ndimalakalaka kukhala ndi moyo wosangalala. Ndine wokonzeka kusiya mabuku anga ndikuwonanso njira ina yophunzirira…
Maulalo:
'Kumanzere Kumafunikira Kusaka Mizimu' ndi Murray Dobin, The Tyee
Zothandizira:
Starhawk. (1997). Kulota mumdima. Boston: Beacon Press.
Winterson, J. Khala Ndi Izi. Ojambula Amakono. (June 2005) p. 98-103
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